iTunes: http://itunes.apple.com/us/album/brokenness-aside/id434412018

Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Brokenness-Aside-EP-No-1/dp/B005938AEG/ref=sr_shvl_album_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1310486118&sr=301-2

Also, check them out on “The Drop” at Relevant Magazine: http://www.relevantmagazine.com/media/the-drop

It is amazing to watch him grow and discover new things.

Something the books told me was that simply by talking while he was in the womb he would recognize my voice. That he would know who his father is.

When he was born, however, the connection for him was not instant (he was more concerned with getting poop out of his body). He would be soothed by his father’s voice, yet the recognition of who I was, still, was not there. I’d imagine if he could talk he would say something like “Wow, this guy is like a big pillow, I think I will sleep on him; He makes me comfortable, I like it.” Or something like that.

About a month ago my son was crying and I went to his crib to answer him. As I put my hand on his belly, made an audible “shh” and said something like “It’s ok” he opened his eyes. There was no Hollywood instant stop to the crying, no big smile and it was over. Actually what happened was better than all of that. During his cries, he looked up at me, and with all the communication that comes in a look, looked at me and recognized me as his dad.

I have loved this kid since I first knew about him, I have loved him through my wife’s pregnancy, through her labor and his birth, and as soon as he appeared even more love came out. He has screamed for hours, pooped his diaper, and peed on me and laughed about it and I can’t help but love him. But for him, he had to recognize me as Dad, and though he is not capable of communicating love the way I am, the acknowledgment, from him, that I am his dad is enough for me.

Jesus told a similar story:

But he who enters by the door is the shepherd of the sheep. To him the gatekeeper opens. The sheep hear his voice, and he calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. When he has brought out all his own, he goes before them, and the sheep follow him, for they know his voice.
John 10:2-4 (ESV)

The best characteristic of the sheep is not anything that they do but the fact that they know the Shepherds voice and they know that they belong to him.

At this point Jesus has not required anything grand. He, actually, requires them to do nothing out of their nature.

They just follow him.

They hear and recognize the voice and they know to follow. They are being called by name, and they turn to their Shepherd and follow him.

Simple.

We are all simple babies. We are selfish and stinky, we cannot fathom what we need, yet in that all, we know the voice of our Dad.

We are all sheep, lost without direction, yet inherent in us is the voice of our master and Shepherd.

What about you? Could it be this simple? How do you know you Father in Heaven? Is he one voice among many for “comfort” or is he the one whom you know? When he says “Come” do you follow?

Most were based on our position in Christ and what he does for us (Died for you and me, Gives us a spot in Heaven, Loves me unconditionally).  I have a few thoughts of my own that I hope you will find helpful.

If our salvation and position in Christ’s sole purpose is for US to achieve acceptance/love/security/eternal life and has no other commanding and persuasive action to it than we are short changing Salvation.

Salvation does something we cannot do for ourselves (Eph. 2:8-9). So for that part we are correct, we know we are Christians because of the faith we have in Jesus Christ and the work he has done for us. This is the work of the cross in our lives.

However, there is an important part of salvation and Christianity that we miss by only focusing on what Christ does for us. We are saved from something (Death, Hell) for something (good works in Christ; Eph. 2:10). This involves the eradication of sin in our lives and a major emphasis on serving outside of ourselves and our personal needs (Matt. 23:23-25).

Being a complete Christian is more then going to a service on Sunday, more than a political opinion, more than a “do’s and don’ts” list. It is the real power of Jesus Christ (God in the flesh) working to restore a dying world. It’s not just that God loves the world but he loves you and chooses you to be a part of his Kingdom and help establish it here on earth and reveal his glory in this world. That’s salvation!
And how do you do that? We share how he has transformed us. We become vulnerable, open, and honest. We don’t lie about anything, we don’t embellish, and we simply tell how Christ has changed us. Be open to what Christ is doing, and love him more than yourself.

The mark of a Christian is that they embrace the call of God on their lives, and that call on its most basic level is to bring Glory to the name of God.

And they have conquered him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony, for they loved not their lives even unto death.
Rev. 12:11

This has only scratched the surface of this issue, I hope you find these thoughts helpful, please leave your thoughts, it is important to think on what salvation is. (Phil. 2:12)

John contemplated marriage for a while. He had been dating Susie for 3 years now and felt it was time. He went to the jewelry store to pick out the cheapest ring he could find and went over to Susie’s house.

As the doorbell rang a feeling of inconvenience ran through John’s body. Susie rushed to the door with anticipation to see the man she loves. When the door opened John let out a disgruntled sigh.

“Hey”

“Hello, John”, Susie said.

“So I think we should get married,” John blurted out,” I don’t want to be alone; you’re not getting any prettier… I’ll still see other people, have fun… and you can cook and clean for me and be at my beck and call.”

Romantic Huh?

If you were Susie your reaction would probably be a slammed door in John’s face (maybe a kick in the groin first) and you would never talk to him again.

It is so clear that John has no true love for Susie. His motivation for getting married is purely for self preservation and want.

It is very clear that John is selfish. No romance is kindled with that kind of proposal.

Yet maybe John is in all of us.

I pass by this church near my neighborhood often. The other day the sign read “Important: Exposure to the Son Prevents Burning” after I giggled a little I wondered if our primary motive as 21st century Christians is “Hell Insurance.” Maybe the mystique of Jesus has worn off and in the end we look at God not as sovereign but as a spare tire kit we never want to use.

With this in mind, I look at the statistics of the modern American church and the decline in the number and I think no wonder.  We are teaching the relationship of John and Susie rather than the upmost devotion and love to a Sovereign God! We are treating Jesus like sunscreen rather than the way, the truth, and the life.

So as you sit at your computer and read, be honest with yourself:

Why did you become a Christian?

Was it Fear? Love? Security?

When you look at the cross of Jesus and what it did for you what is your response?

Is it Devotion? Relief?

Are you John?

I look at the story of John and Susie and wonder if it was always like this. I wonder if John ever truly loved Susie. Maybe he did and after days, or weeks,  or months, or years of being together he just gave up on wooing her.

It is easy to throw stones at John but we have all been there.

The problem is that we forget just why we loved and thus forget why we should still love. Because someone told us that love is a onetime thing, “you say it once and your good forever” we use that as our excuse. And we so easily forget what true love has meant, means, and will mean to us.

But I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first. Remember therefore from where you have fallen…

Revelation 2:4-5a ESV

I wonder what the power of the Church would be if we didn’t sell “Hell Insurance” but rather the Grace and Sovereignty of our Lord Jesus Christ.

IF THEN you have been raised with Christ [to a new life, thus sharing His resurrection from the dead], aim at and seek the [rich, eternal treasures] that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God.
-Colossians 3:1

Do you ever feel guilty?

Sorry, stupid question, of course you have, we all have.

I remember when I was younger and in order to fit in I would sometimes pick on other children. One of the tricks we would play was intentionally “befriending” people, gain their trust, and then lead them into a trap. Every time we would do this I would just feel horrible. I never understood how people can laugh while others cry, or say “well that’s your fault for trusting me.”

It’s like the old sales trick, the bait and switch. We promised friendship, acceptance, a game of catch, and then once they feel comfortable, not only do we trick them, we delight in their pain.

I wonder how much we have grown up.

As Christians we believe we are given a new life in Christ. Our Spirit has been replaced, we are born anew. Yet the modern church resembles the school playground.

I was talking to a gentleman the other day who had recently left one church for another, and was about to make the move again. I asked him what it was about his church that he offended him so much. He told me that the church “got a new pastor and he doesn’t sing the old hymns anymore, he only wants to sing new songs.” So he is planning on going to another church. After this man and I talked I paused, and thought, “how often is this the case?” How many times has someone left a church over music, or a preaching style, over decorations, or the fact that no one respects your pew?

Recently in the town I live in there was a major church split, while I am uncertain of the issues that caused the split, I do know that one Sunday morning, while the pastor was preaching, members of the church began to stand up and shout at him, and eventually ran him off the stage. The sheriff’s department was called in and the pastor and his associates were guarded in their offices until the mob subsided. I heard this story from a few people who were there and my heart broke.

We are living in a new life with an old life mentality. The church is supposed to be different, the church is supposed to bring people together not rip them apart.

Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.  Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.  Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony.

Colossians 3:12-14

To live in this new life we must stop the pettiness.

In order for the church to bring change into this world, we must first change ourselves.

The church must be described as the entity that only love can bind together. When we look at the church we have to say “there is no way this group of people, so different, should come together.” We must make allowances for others faults, and allow God’s perfect grace to work in us, to transform us, in order that we could transform the world.

At that time in my life I didn’t know what a “blog” was or how to write for content I just knew that it’s what my friends did and so then I must too. In high school it turned to xanga, then to myspace, then facebook, now it seems to have a blog or a twitter isn’t anything special. Most of my entries tended to be a short paragraph about the mediocre events of my life spiced with the word amazing and riddled with grammar and spelling errors(some things don’t change).

“wow so IDIOT RYAN dropped his phone in the ocean…….. but other then that I had a fun day with Micah Cassie and Chris at the Beach… so yeah  ill see you all in a few days with an awesome sunburn…” Actual entry on my xanga from 2004

In fact most of my friends/ family have some sort of social networking concoction at their reach.

Why is it that we find it necessary to have these expressions in our life?

I am, seemingly, constantly defending my twitter account. It never fails that when I bring out my blackberry in a store or at a park or in a meeting I get the question “what are you doing?” or my wife apologizes for me “Sorry, He’s just tweeting.”

You could only imagine the looks I get when I am tweeting…

But I can’t help it. something in me feels the need, and the urge to share (however insignificant) my thoughts/actions/encouragements with others. It is ingrained in me. I am on social network overload in my brain.

To dissect the reason why I feel that urge I ran across a familiar story. Jesus is talking to a Samaritan woman at the well through their conversation Jesus offers forgiveness and salvation to a woman who felt undeserving. after the conversation however she does something familiar to all of us:

“The woman left her water jar beside the well and ran back to the village, telling everyone, ’Come and see a man who told me everything I ever did! Could he possibly be the Messiah?’” John 4:28-29

So ingrained in us is our desire to tell others our story.

I ask myself, “why do I feel the need to use social networking?” and the answer is plain, there is a need in us to tell others good news, to share with others our struggle, to have others read our story.

All of us do it to an extent.

Now the crux is this: the story you share, shows who your author is.

The woman at the well shared of new life and a salvation she showed that Jesus has entered the story as her author… And I share about a cell phone being dropped in the ocean.

I ask you to look at your story, look at what you show others… who is your author?

Now, may you see that your story is one to share, may you find the author who can weave forgiveness, salvation and new life in you, and may you RUN back to the village and share your story.

I have been noticing that about myself lately, the things I want to do (Like this blog) I don’t have time for.
However, I do think it is important for me to every few months to speak or write my mind on issues. This blog was set up as a cry for change in the church today. Not a complaint but an active force within the structure itself that will bring to the surface life (see earlier posts).
A few months ago a friend from Kansas sent out a request to all young united Methodist pastors to participate in a 40 day prayer campaign for the United Methodist Church (UMC). Young Pastors/Clergy/Leaders in the UMC will contribute prayers and commit to pray for 40 days when most annual conferences are being held. The prayers will be for reform within the UMC, along with the prayers the pastors were asked to send in their vision for the next 25 years in the church. This movement is an encouragement to me; if you have read my blog at all you may have realized that I have a heart for social justice issues, as well as general reform within the church. I believe with my whole heart that reform/change can only occur in the unity of the body of Christ.

For years now I have felt this need for change within the Church. To borrow a line from Francis Chan “I read the New Testament and saw that it didn’t line up with the modern American church.” I have campaigned for change within the church. I read Acts and long for a time where we too can simply meet need for people and not have to “Package” it in a way that is not offensive. I long for a time that the theme of Christianity stops being profit based yet the needs of people can truly be met and Matthew 25 can be a model for our walk with Christ. I am sick of seeing the story of Christianity dominated by big budget preachers, prosperity gospels, empire praises, and people searing two masters. I want to see the church fully embrace a love for holiness and the word of God.

In these 40 days my prayer is for the Church to realize its potential in this world. That the force that conquered death is the same force that we are empowered with today! Not just to “be good people” but to bring Christ to the forefront of our story! Not an afterthought, not shout out. My prayer is that we see the resurrected Christ and out lives are never the same. We get messed up, we seek to lose all we have and are to embrace all that God has for us. My prayer is that we lose our lives for the sake of the Gospel and gain all the Christ has for us.

So this Spring I invite you all to Pray! To follow this movement please got to www.umcyoungclergy.com. The 40 days start May 18th!

I decided a while ago that I would not be restricted by Alarm Clocks… I hate waking up to the sound of beeping, I also don’t set the alarm on my phone, not that I don’t mind being woken up by the polyphonic version of ‘Gold-digger”, it’s just not my thing; I want to be awoken when my body, and God, decide I should.

So this morning I woke up around 10:30am (the day before I woke up at 5:30am so this was a welcome change) and a friend of mine called to talk to me about major issues in his life.

I listened. Talked. Gave advice.

He is facing a discussion that is pretty major and cuts to the heart of us post modern/radical/young/idealistic type people, “Can I stay in a “Church” that is opposite to what and where I feel the Church should be?”

It’s a tough decision.

What is the role of the church in this day? Has it changed since the day of Pentecost in 30 ad?

Because the role of the church today would be everything that is anti-Empire and pro-Kingdome. It would be a movement that won through peace not war. Through a sharing in common not a reliance on one rich person. It would be genuine interest in people not using people as a means to an end.

But as a Student and Families Pastor in the United States am I the biggest part of the problem?

I look on Amazon.com, CBD, go to any Christian Bookstore and find hundreds of titles about growing your Church, reinventing the offering plate. You read books about trying to get congregation members to give more, leave money in their will. We treat people like comoddies.

I get calls and mailings about church planners, how people can revamp the way I do things to make church more efficient, get more people, and increase giving. It nearly sickens me not because I think of the better ways our church can spend money but because I know that people have used them. They come recommended, there are blurbs about them. Pastors, Bishops have used them and recommend them.

Sometimes I find myself more focused on our Churches financial problems then the life changing stories of the real people around me. I try to find new creative ways to explain giving, not so our church can do more to end stupid poverty, but so we can pay our website host and our easy worship subscription.

Sometimes I feel as if I work for the empire, I am a Sadducee, I am Caesar’s P.R. guy, I am living in the scandal and doing my best to cover it up.

I am flawed, the system is flawed.

Church is not flawed. Church at its root is people accepting the call to be more then the machines and classes that the empire has told them they are. It is community, people realizing with stuff and things they are incomplete but if they are open to share all things in common, if they see that the Scandal of industry is written into the $10.99 on sale shirt that they bought last weekend and choose to be anti that. That is Church, it isn’t of the world, it isn’t the graphics and cool marketing, it isn’t great speakers that cause us to write big check for a multi-million dollar parking garages so we can get into our air conditioned movie theatre style building faster. It is real people, with hurts, needs, broke and rich coming together for help, encouragement, and life. 

Life though Jesus not stuff.

Life through Saving not Consumption.

May you come to see that the Scandal need to be exposed walked away from. May you see the Church reclaim her dignity, and place in this world. May you be Anti-Empire and Pro-Kingdome. and May you come to the love, grace, and mercy of our God, his Son Jesus, and his Holy Spirit. Amen.

I get into it… the people, the drama, and the ridiculous challenges. I am glued to the T.V. for the entire show.

I even have this silly dream to be on one of these shows one day.

I love the roles that people play. The bad boy, the out spoken drama starter, the entitled silver spooner, or even the crazy religious person. You know the one right? The one telling everyone that they are right because God is on their side and no one else’s… Sometimes I wonder why does this person think this? Where does Jesus say that you will defiantly succeed if you are a Christian? That’s not the Christ that I read.

I am promised everlasting life, but not smooth sailing. Jesus says blessed are you if you are persecuted in my name, because it is in fact joining the great tradition of believers (see Matt 5:10-12). In fact Jesus says that we need to take up our Cross daily Just like He did (see Luke 9:22-24)… to me that sounds painful, sounds like persecution, it sounds hard.

So why then on reality T.V. do people feel that the Christian road is the smoothest road out there? Christ compares the walk of a Christian to the worst persecution and torture of the day and they say it’s a party, it’s easy, and above that it requires nothing. And you know what’s great about that, on Reality T.V. if you call yourself a Christian your lifestyle doesn’t have to match up. You can be the most spiteful, hateful, rude, inconsiderate, greedy, self-centered person you can imagine, but as long as you read your bible, call yourself a Christian you are in like Flint.

Because in the reality T.V. world the important thing isn’t that you are an honorable person but it’s that you win. That the million dollars or the half-million, or the recording contract, or the fame is yours at the end of the day, not for any other reason but that you beat other people. And when you win you will say “I would like to thank God, because he helped me win this game.” or “God made me win this prize.”

I don’t get it, I just don’t understand it. Because we know I’m not just talking about the Reality T.V. world.

The other day I heard a speech about America’s position on diplomatic talks with enemy nations and 3rd world nations, and the speaker actually said the he doesn’t believe that talking with the president of America should be a prize to be won or a privilege for the elite. When I heard this I was encouraged, here was a man that was running for president that actually said what I feel, that there should not be an “us vs. them” mentality in the world.

I shared this story with some close friends and there thoughts were staggering. I heard one person say that “this is unpatriotic” and others said that it was anti-American and so on. The sentiment was that we as Americans have worked to be the number one country in the world and with that comes with the privilege to act superior. It hurt to hear my friends say this, not just because they disagree with me but because they are Christians and are placing there allegiance to there country ahead of there allegiance to God.

How do we as Christian separate our allegiance, our changed lives, our sense of right and wrong for money, prosperity, or politics? I see it every day, hate, greed, selfishness all put ahead of the God who rescued us.

Last night I was watching more reality T.V.

But this time it was something special. American Idol last night was a special show called “Idol Gives Back,” on this show for over 2 hours celebrities were raising money for kids all around the world living in poverty and disease. I was crying nearly every time that showed a child living with AIDS or kids living on the street. Because to me it is such a simple problem to fix.

And in the middle of it all I heard a song.

I had heard this song before but never really responded to it because I didn’t like how it sounded, but last night someone covered it and for the first time I heard this lyric:

So you scream from behind your door
Say “what’s mine is mine and not yours”
I may have too much but I’ll take my chances
Because God’s stopped keeping score
And you cling to the things they sold you
Did you cover your eyes when they told you
That he can’t come back
Because he has no children to come back for
‘Praying for Time’

I wept.

You see God cares what we do here in this country. And God cares what we do with our wealth.

One of my favorite stories in the bible is the story of the rich young ruler. In this story a man comes up to Jesus and asks him what does he have to do to obtain eternal life? And Jesus says “obey the commandments” then the man says “I have done that my whole life, what else?”

Then Jesus, looking at him, loved him, and said to him,
“One thing you lack: Go your way, sell whatever you have and give to the poor,
and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, take up the cross, and follow Me.”
But he was sad at this word, and went away sorrowful, for he had great possessions.
Mark 10:21-22 NKJV

You see it’s not enough to say we are Christian, read the Bible, and then abandon everything when certain things come into the picture.

The Rich man stayed rich, my friends didn’t want to be “unpatriotic”, and the reality T.V. star won the prize. And all they had to do was walk away.

Jesus isn’t asking for a statement of faith but for people to take up the cross and follow him.